At first, in Valencia I thought they liked outdoor urinals, then I realized it's just art stuff (Spanish architecture is world class).
Some of them are walk-through urinals (probably want to wash your feet afterwards).
The Spaniards are into art in a weird way. I'll save you the close-up, but trust me, this giant statue of a naked guy sitting on the dock is anatomically correct.
There is quite a bit of art in the port of Cartegna
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| Off to sea I go! |
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| Sonuvabitch, I missed the damn ship |
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| I gotta stop drinking so much in port |
In Cartegna none of us could figger out just what in the hell this statue in a shop window was. My guess was the Spanish gay KKK.
As it turns out, these are Spanish Penitents during Catholic Holy Week. This tradition started back in the middle ages whereby the wearers of the robes could perform penance (read - whack themselves silly out of guilt) while remaining anonymous. People will do anything to wear a uniform.
The touristy spots in Spain have lots of Africans trying to eke out a living selling all kinds of stuff that they display on blankets on the ground.
The blankets, however, serve a different purpose than you might at first imagine. Watch what happens when 5-0 walks up.
In Palermo, Sicily, I witnessed another police dodging scam. I had been walking down the street of one of the markets when I realized I was hearing music. This was unusual. Normally the markets are (relatively) quiet. I decided to stop and get a cup of espresso. While I was sitting, drinking my espresso, I noticed this shifty character across the street staring intently up the street.
All of a sudden, the music stopped and a laundry cart looking thing was whisked across the street and deep down an alley by another man.
Sure enough, in about 30 seconds a group of Carabinieri (Italian po-po) drove by. Wisely, I decided not to photograph any of them. Nothing happened, the music didn't resume. In another two minutes two more walking Carabinieri strolled up the street, none the wiser. After they passed, the cart returned, the music played on and Shifty resumed his watch.
Spaniards love their dogs, but don't allow them in grocery stores. The store does, however, provide a special dog parking space. Complete with dog hitch.
Does this ship look familiar?
It's the Costa Magica. Part of the same line of ships as this more infamous one
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| Costa Concordia "Costa Concordia salvage July crop" by Soerfm - Own work. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons - http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Costa_Concordia_salvage_July_crop.jpg#/media/File:Costa_Concordia_salvage_July_crop.jpg
In Santeria, Italy, I found some of the earlier ships that Captain Francesco Schettino (dipshit captain of the Concordia disaster) commanded.
  
Oops! Time to abandon ship again.
Sometimes menu translations are hilarious (yet correct).  |
I don't hang out in bars so I'm not sure if you can find one of these handy gizmos in the US.
I wonder what the record is? Does the one in the women's room transmit the data back to the cell phone of the guy buying her drinks?
Portugal owns (if you will) the archipelago of the Azores. On Ponta Delgada (the largest island) you will find "the most beautiful fresh water lake in the world" (supposedly voted by some self serving travel log, whatever). Its called Lagoa das Sete Cidades. I wasn't all that impressed, however to be fair, I visited at the wrong time of the year. The lake is a crater lake, formed when the volcano went kablooey. Obviously it's up in the hills
As you can tell from the photographs, I was lucky to even see it. The fog rolled in 2 minutes after I took the shot and the lake disappeared.
When I say I was there at the wrong time of year what I mean is that the lake, although it's one continuous lake, during the warmer months develops two colors. One side is green and one side is deep blue. This happens because the lake is the result of two different volcanic explosions. One side has a different bottom chemistry than the other. In the warm months, the more shallow part of the lake develops algae blooms - making that part of the lake green (and probably somewhat rank). The local legend has it that the two colors of the lake formed from the tears of the unrequited love between a beautiful (aren't they always) princess and her shepard boy interest. The mean nasty King wouldn't let them marry.....yada yada yada. Click here if you want the full story
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lagoa_das_Sete_Cidades According to the local gulls nesting in the surrounding hills, the story is cute, but bullshit (gulls are hard to impress unless it involves food)
Near Valencia Spain (where Valencia oranges originate) you will find a most spectacular and unique lake - underground!
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| entrance |
Explorations of the cave started in 1902 by brave spelunkers. Spelunker is Latin and translates roughly to 'complete moron with a death wish'. Early explorers found traces of man's presence in the lake that date back 17,000 years. In the 1960's the lake was opened up to tourism. I took the tour by boat and I simply cannot comprehend just how scary it had to be for someone 17,000 years ago to explore it. Especially without even candles. If you've always wondered if you're claustrophobic - by the end of the boat tour you will no longer be in doubt. Either you will have a terrific time, or you will be taken out in a strait jacket by those men in the white coats ha ha ho ho hee hee. If you take a triple dose of Valium, the tour is simply magnificent. You start by boarding a wooden boat that is poled by a dour Spaniard in the stern.
The boats aren't big ~ 12 people.
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| New boat on display outside the cave |
I have to admit, the lighting in the lake was well thought out and executed. The lights are underwater and shine up. Unfortunately you aren't allowed to use a camera, but I did the best I could surreptitiously (cell phone, no flash).
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| looking up |
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| Low bridge, everybody down. |
Definitely one of the best tours I've ever taken (OK, I stole some of the above pictures from the web).
In Europe, as in the US, pigeons (or Rock Doves if you prefer) like to sit on statues.
These are the steps of the big opera house in Palermo (Teatro Massimo). In Gawdfatha 3, these are the steps where Michael's assassin misses him and shoots his daughter (played by Sofia Copola) instead
The opera house is huge. Here's the architect's wooden model they followed when building it in 1897.
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| Yesssss, I know. I really blew this shot of my friend Evan playing the fool, but I was laughing so hard it was the best I could do. |
Those panels with the fresco painted on them open up.
You might expect that the balcony seats are the most expensive.
When it was built, they were. The main floor was standing room only and was for the peasants and assorted riffraff. Today, the main floor has had red seats installed and they are the most expensive (ironic). The exception is the royal box seats.
The royal box seats are where Michael Corleone sat in Gawdfatha 3.
Like everything else in Italy, the outside of the Teater is covered in statues. This is the guy who designed the place (Giovanni Battista Filippo Basil).
He looks kinda like this guy?
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| Samuel Clemens/Mark Twain |
Ever wonder what lion nuts look like?
The local dogs weren't impressed.
Ahh, Italian drunks.
This guy was hilarious. He actually believed he was doing well impressing some Italian college girls.
